Posts Tagged ‘Fatherhood’

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man is he who listens to counsel.” ~ Proverbs 12:15

Most men are long rangers, says Ronnie Roque, founder of Who me be a leader, the word counsel is like a slap in the face to them.”

What is it that keeps a fool from being wise?

His way is right in his own eyes. He thinks he is in the right in everything he does, and therefore asks no advice, because he does not apprehend he needs it. He is confident he knows the way, and cannot miss it, and therefore never inquires the way. The rule he goes by is to do that which is right in his own eyes, to walk in the way of his heart. He makes his will his law. He is a fool that is governed by his eye, and not by his conscience.

What it is that keeps a wise man from being a fool?

He is willing to be advised, desires to have counsel given him, and heeds and gives attention to counsel—what has been said, being reserved and restrained in manner when it comes to his own judgment and having a value for the direction of those that are wise and good. He is wise (it is a sign he is so, and he is likely to continue so) whose ear is always open to good advice.

To learn more about a wise man please watch Ronnie’s Youtube video.”

Excerpts taken and revised from Matthew Henry Commentator.

In this video Ronnie talks about fear being another cause of the failure of men when they fail to make the tough decisions. A lot of times we are fearful because we want to be liked by the world and we fear rejection. We also would rather not make any decision at all  than to make a wrong one. This is when our fear can set us up for failure and stifle us as leaders.

 

In this video Ronnie talks about the danger of letting things slide. Failure come in many different ways. One way is being passive. This passivity leads us to falling as men and the ones that suffer are our families. Men, I want to challenge you to have the guts to make the hard choice to do what is right for the benefit of the kingdom and your family.  But first you need to know the difference: if you never know what wrong is, then how will you know what is right?

In the previous videos we talked about procrastination being a silent killer and what a wife should do if she has a procrastinating husband. In this final video we conclude that since procrastination is the act of willfully delaying that which needs to be done, then a wife should continue to pray for her husband and support him. She will need to remain within the structure of leadership within her family and not over-step her role, yet trust God to give her strength to continue to care for her family.

Proverbs 23:7 says: “For as a man thinks within himself, so he is.”

As I travel around to different places and talk to men from all walks of like, the one thing that is clear is that men don’t like to think about deep stuff such as God’s agenda for their home. We think more about things than we do about people. Proverbs 13:22 says a good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children. I think as men we need to be more about God’s business than our own.

Everyone that has visited this blog long enough knows that Chuck Swindoll is one of my favorite teachers and he has a three part devotion called “Mental Barriers to God’s Voice”, based on 2 Cor 10:1-7. As you read it, I would like you to think about what mental blocks you may have that are keeping you away from God.

Mental Barriers to God’s Voice, Part 1

When the world tries to squeeze us into its mold, God’s message gets muffled. Our minds pick up on the strong secular signals so easily that we subconsciously tune Him out. It comes naturally.

In ancient days, a city, in order to prosper, needed a security system to protect it from enemy attack. Of primary importance was a wall which restrained enemy troops from invading and which also served as a major means of defense in battle. Guards needed to be on constant watch from their sentinel posts on the wall. There needed to be towers within the city high enough for those inside to see over the wall. And finally, at the time of attack, men of military savvy and battle knowledge were needed to give orders and to direct the troops in the heat of combat from within the protection of those towers.

Paul drew a series of analogies from that familiar scene of his day… but remember, he’s not dealing with a city but rather with our minds. The passage in 2 Corinthians 10:1-7 sets forth a vivid description of the mental barriers that block out God’s directives and His counsel. Look closely. Paul uses four terms that we need to understand. If you have a pencil handy, circle each in your Bible:    fortresses….. speculations….. lofty things….. thought.

As the Spirit of God attempts to communicate His truth to us (biblical information on servanthood, for example), He runs up against our “wall,” our overall mental attitude, our natural mind-set. For some, it’s prejudice. With others, it’s limited thinking or a negative mentality. Whatever it is, it’s a huge mental barrier that resists divine input just as firmly as a massive stone wall once resisted invading troops.

We all have our fortresses. And occasionally we get downright obnoxious as we operate under the control of our “walled fortresses.” Need a good example?

A vagrant was looking for a handout in a picturesque old English village. Hungry almost to the point of fainting, he stopped by a pub bearing the classic name, “Inn of St. George and the Dragon.”

“Please ma’am, could you spare me a bite to eat?” he asked the lady who answered his knock at the kitchen door.

“A bite to eat?” she growled. “For a sorry, no-good bum – a foul-smelling beggar? No!” she snapped as  she almost slammed the door on his hand.

Halfway down the lane the tramp stopped, turned around, and eyed the words, “St. George and the Dragon”. He went back and knocked again on the kitchen door.

“Now what do you want?” the woman gruffed.

“Well, ma’am, if  St George is in, may I speak with him this time?”

It is undeniable the influence that Chuck Swindoll has had in my life. Approximately 18 years ago when I decided to turn my life completely over to God and submerse myself in His Word, I have regularly turned to The Bible Teaching Ministry of Charles Swindoll. His teaching is practical, biblically sound and continues to challenge me to grow.

At Who Me Be A Leader, we periodically like to highlight some of his teaching in hopes that it will also challenge you and encourage you and cause you to examine yourself. As we have always said, we believe a life unexamined is not a life worth living.

The Consequences of Sin are evident if you will read 2 Samuel 11:1-12:13.

Nathan didn’t come on his own; he was sent by God: “Then the Lord sent Nathan to David.” I think the most important word in that sentence is the first one, “then.” God’s timing is absolutely incredible.

When was he sent? Right after the act of adultery? No. Right after Bathsheba said, “I am pregnant”? No. Right after he murdered Uriah? No. Right after he married Uriah’s pregnant widow? No. Right after the birth of the baby? No. It’s believed by some Old Testament scholars that there was at least a twelve month interval that passed before Nathan paid that visit. God waited until just the right time. He let the grinding wheels of sin do their full work, and then He stepped in.

To be totally honest with you, there are times when I really question the timing of God. Times when I just don’t know why He’s so slow to carry out what I think He ought to do. But every time I have looked back in retrospect, I have seen how beautifully He worked out His plan, how perfectly it had come to pass. God not only does the right thing; He does the right thing at the right time.

In confronting someone in his sin, the timing is as important as the wording. Most importantly, you need to be sure that you are sent by God. Nathan was.

In his sin, David had despised the God he served. Now as a result of that sin, in days and years to some, David would experience grief within his own household.

Thus says the Lord, “Behold, I will raise up evil
against you from your own household; I will even take
your wives before your eyes and give them to your
companion, and he shall lie with your wives in broad
daylight. Indeed, you did it secretly, but I will do
this thing before all Israel, and under the sun.”
(2 Samuel 12:11-12)

Whew! Talk about the consequences of sin. David sits there with his mouth still open, leaning back, perhaps staring at the ceiling, listening to the voice of God from Nathan.

David, realizing he was absolutely guilty, admitted without hesitation, “I have sinned. I’ve sinned against the Lord.” With that admission, restoration began.

Excerpted from Charles R. Swindoll, Great Days with the Great Lives(2005).

God sends different people into our lives for different reasons. Some to teach us, some to correct and some to reproof. Just as God sent Nathan to speak the truth to David, in love. He also sends people in to our lives for the same purpose. We need to not be quick to dismiss correction or get angry, but take time to examine yourself and receive this as it may be coming from God. Ask yourself, “Is what this person saying true and does it line up with God’s Word?” 1 John 1:9 says “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” It is then that our restoration begins.

We at Who Me Be a Leader have a deep desire for you to fall in love with God’s Word. The truth is, how we handle something depends on its value to us, and many people simply don’t realize the absolute treasure God has given them in His Word. Nothing you or I own is more precious than the Bible. People who ignore Scripture suffer as a result and go through life’s hardships without ever realizing the riches at their fingertips. However, those who embrace God’s Word discover benefits that money could never buy.

What is keeping you from the blessing of God’s Word? Some people say they don’t read Scripture because they say it is too difficult to understand. Here are some practical ideas to help you use God’s Word and begin applying it to your life.

First: READ. The first step it to open your Bible and begin reading it daily, small portions at first (Prov 8:33-35). Choose a time when you are able to focus all your attention on reading without interruption. Apart from prayer and worship, reading the Word is one of the primary ways we get to know Him. Those who read only during times of crisis miss the joy of an intimate relationship with the heavenly Father, which develops through consistent fellowship with Him.

Bible reading is a matter of quality not quantity. You should be most concerned with how effectively Scripture is changing your life rather than the number of chapters you have completed. As you go through the Bible, you should be storing the Lord’s truths in your heart. The goal is character transformation and an ever-deepening relationship with your Savior.

Second: MEDITATE. Meditation is simply a conversation with the Lord about the passage you’re reading. It’s a discipline that requires silence, stillness and concentration. Word by word and phrase by phrase, ask the Father to reveal both the meaning and the application He wants you to make in your life.

The process is slow and thoughtful, but as your continue, the Bible’s pages will come to life with significance. Always remembering your goal is a deeper understanding of God and yourself. Ask Him to show you His ways, search your heart, and reveal any changes you need to make.

Three: STUDY. How often do we really look for the Lord, examining Scripture for understanding about His ways? So often we ready the Bible only when we are searching for a verse to help us with a need. But do we care enough about Him to search out His character and learn who He really is? One of the greatest benefits of investing our time in thoughtful Bible study is an ever-increasing love for our Savior.

To supplement your studies, we also recommend investing in a Bible dictionary, a concordance and some Bible commentaries.

Four: APPLY. This step is essential. In order to become a mature Christian, you must learn to apply what you have learned. As we spend time reading the Bible, the Lord reveals what He wants us to do, whether through direct commands, principles, or examples. However, if we ignore His promptings or refuse to obey, we’ll get stuck and stop growing. Why should God reveal deeper truths if we haven’t done the last thing He said? In that case, our understanding of Scripture will be limited, our walk will suffer, and our spiritual fruit will dry up. Remember that obeying God is always the best path. The Father both uses and blesses those who say no to self and yes to Him (Prov 3:5-6).

The Lord has so much to give us if we will just make Bible reading a priority in our lives. He wants us to long for “the pure milk of the word” so that we can grow into mature believers (1 Pet. 2:1-2). Few of us will miss a meal, but how often do we skip spending time in the pages of Scripture? How can we be so careful to feed our bodies, which will one day die, and yet starve our spirits, which will live forever?

If you’ll start seriously “tasting” God’s Word, you will begin to develop a hunger to go deeper. Not only that, but the more familiar we become with the Bible, the more we will value and delight in it (Psalm 119:111). Instead of feeling an obligation to read, we’ll long to spend time hearing from our Savior and growing in our understanding of His character and ways.

Excerpts from “Transformed by The Word” by Charles Stanley

This Memorial Day, Who Me Be A Leader would like to pause and remember those that have served, fought and sacrificially given their lives for our country. Because of their sacrifice we are able to live in freedom. As a nation we should be forever grateful for those that have served in the armed forces, past and present, and also for their families.

As we reflect on their great sacrifices, it should always bring us back to the One who made the Ultimate sacrifice for our lives and our freedom – Jesus. Galatians 5:1 says, “It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery.” John 8:36 says, “So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.” So, remember the next time you feel the world has you in bondage, think about those who gave their life for your life so that you may be free.

On this Memorial Day as we reflect on those who have served and shown great courage, sacrificing their lives for us, we should give them honor and respect because of our freedom. Scripture says we are to give honor where honor is due, according to Romans 13:7. So, let’s remember our leaders, we are to obey and submit to them because they keep watch over our souls and we are to imitate their faith.

May God bless you and keep you is our prayer, and remember, a life unexamined is not a life worth living.

Here at “Who Me Be a Leader“, we are not male chauvinist, but we do believe that God has a structure for everything and for a reason. Men are to lead their families no matter what happens and where they find themselves.

In this video, Ronnie talks to fathers who find themselves away from their home, whether its due to incarceration or divorce.God has entrusted you to the role of Father if you have children.  We also believe that in order for this to take place that you need God’s help and His grace. So, Men, we are challenging you to turn your heart towards home so God will be able to use your efforts to bless your children.