Posts Tagged ‘Men’

So far, Ronnie has been talking about being trained men. Now, what comes after the training?

Accountability.  Some of you may not like that word, but accountability is actually a good thing.  Take a listen to hear why.

In his video, Biblical Counselor & life coach, Ronnie Roque shares some key areas of who you need to be held accountable to and in what areas you should be held accountable men.

  • Relationships.  Ronnie says that we must be held accountable in relationships.
  • Your wife.  He says that no one knows you better than that lady who is sleeping beside you.
  • Your children
  • Time & money is certainly an area that we need to give an account to.
  • personal struggles
  • moral & ethical behavior

In order to walk like a leader men, Ronnie says you must first think of yourselves as a leader.


In this video Ronnie addresses the long comments left in the comment section of WMBL.

Due to the serious nature of many of your comments, Ronnie has decided to bring his Biblical counseling ministry and his life coaching services online.

We are still working on a few things and should have the page ready by Sunday, which is the next time Ronnie will post.

To help us better serve you we have put a questionnaire together and ask for your help by answering the questions honestly.

Your identity will be anonymous so please be candid.


In this video, Ronnie shares that it is his desire for every professing Christian man to be trained.

How does a man become trained?  Watch the video as Ronnie gives you three steps to becoming a trained man.

“Our job as teachers is to explain the Bible, not explain it away.  A great Bible teacher is not a great teacher of the Bible, but a teacher of the great Bible  We use Scripture to explain our experience, not our experience to explain Scripture.  Without the Bible to guide you every path not obviously evil will seem obvious worth while.” ~ Patrick Morley {quoted by Ronnie Roque}

Three steps to becoming trained:

  1. Daily reading of the Bible
  2. Study the Bible
  3. Trust the Word of God
“And remember a life unexamined is a life not worth living.” 

Ronnie Roque continues his teaching from Patrick Morley’s book, ‘Pastoring men.’  In this particular video, Ronnie talks about the importance of a man being adequately trained giving reference to 2 Tim. 3:16 .  Mr. Roque feels that a man is trained properly in the area of discipleship when he is capable of leading himself spiritually first and foremost.”

On the other hand, he feels that an untrained man or rather a man who isn’t discipled has problems with taking his issues before God.  This man professes to know the Lord, but has yet become comfortable in going to him on his own behalf.

“Spiritual reformation of society starts with a spiritual reformation of men,” Ronnie quotes.

What does a disciple look like you may be asking?   “A disciple is called to walk with Christ, equip to look like Christ, and sent to work for Christ,” he goes on to say.

Points to remember:

  • We can give men what they need if instead of looking at the data, we look at  God’s direction.
  •  An untrained Christian is no better  off than an unskilled laborer a high school drop out.  He simply won’t enjoy as much of the abundant life as a man who has been discipled.

Steps to becoming a trained man by Patrick Morley

What is a Quiet Time?

In our Christian culture we hear a lot mentioned about a device called “the quiet time”. A quiet time is a routine period, usually at the beginning or end of the day, in which five, fifteen, thirty minutes, an hour or more are set aside to read and study God’s Word, pray, and possibly perform other spiritual disciplines. For example, sometimes I sing hymns (no one besides God would want to hear), journal or read devotional materials.

Actually, the Bible calls for continual prayer and Bible meditation. “Pray continually” (1 Thess.5:17). “Pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests” (Eph. 6:18). “His delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night” (Psalm 1:2).

The quiet time, then, is an accommodation to an overly busy culture. Nevertheless, the concept of setting aside a regular time for concentrated meeting with the Lord can greatly enhance anyone’s walk with God. In fact, without it, it is questionable if you can really have an ongoing relationship with Christ.

How much time should you devote to daily quiet time? If you don’t already have a quiet time, why not consider giving five minutes a day to read one chapter of the New Testament (read one chapter a day five days a week and you will complete the 260 chapters of the New Testament in one year). Then, say a prayer like The Lord’s Prayer, or you could use the ACTS acrostic (A-adoration, C-confession, T-thanksgiving, S-supplication). Consider setting a maximum time limit for devotional life, rather than a minimum. This will keep down the guilt. Later, if you want to increase the time you spend, fine. Many spend 15 or 30 minutes. It is not uncommon for some to devote an hour, and some invest as much as two hours. But start with a realistic goal. The best length of time is the one you will actually do. Don’t bite off more than you will chew.

How often should you have a quiet time? Shoot for five days a week. Don’t expect to make it every day (allowing for early morning meetings, glitches, etc.) You wouldn’t expect to eat once or twice a week and be healthy. Neither can you feed your spirit only once or twice a week and expect spiritual health.

When and where should you have a quiet time? Pick the time of day that you are most alert-your quality time. Give God your peak concentration. Also, it’s probably best to have a routine time and place. It’s the same principle your mother taught you about your schoolwork.

What if you don’t feel like having a quiet time? From time to time I don’t “feel” like listening and speaking to God-but I do it anyway. What if God said, “I don’t feel like meeting with you today either.” You would think he doesn’t love you very much. Whenever a man tells me that he doesn’t feel very close to God the first question I ask is, “Tell me about your devotional life.” Often the problem is just there. If you don’t feel like meeting with God, I suggest you substitute discipline for a lack of natural interest. In time the “feelings” and natural interest will return.

Since the two principal activities of a quiet time are reading the Bible and prayer, let’s look more closely at these two.

Reading The Bible

The Bible is God speaking to man. The Bible communicates the truth of God to men in search of ultimate reality. The God who is, is revealed in Scripture. The Bible, then, is the starting point of a life with God. He is rich who dwells upon God’s Word. Psalm 19: 7-11 says this:

The law of the LORD is perfect, reviving the soul. The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes. The fear of the LORD is pure, enduring forever. The ordinances of the LORD are sure and altogether righteous. They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the comb. By them is your servant warned; in keeping them there is great reward.

A friend in the publishing business tells me that only 30% of college graduates never read a book again after graduation. Reading and study have largely been replaced by television and video. For the Christian, however, reading and study open the door to communication from God.

Frankly, after more than twenty years of following Christ, I find I no longer read my Bible. My Bible reads me. On its crinkly pages I see myself-my motives, my ambitions, my longings, my pain, my sufferings, my sins, my hope, my joy. As the rustling pages turn I see God-His love, His forgiveness, His birth, His death, His resurrection, His sovereignty, His holiness, His character. I love my Bible. I love the Bible because I don’t have to worry about receiving “flash updates” or corrective bulletins.” I don’t have to worry about factory “recall.” I don’t have to be concerned about whether or not a “retraction” will appear in tomorrow’s version. I love my Bible because it is true, and truth doesn’t change. In a world awash with change, I’m glad to have an anchor, a solid rock upon which to build my life.


Prayer is man speaking to God. God wants us to pray. Prayer is how we communicate with God.

When a friend of mine became deathly ill with cancer, another friend asked me how he was doing. “He’s a very sick boy,” I said. “I guess the only thing we can do is pray.”

“No,” he corrected. “The thing we can do is pray.” What gave his statement added authority was that he offered this advice just six months after his own wife of 26 years had died from cancer. Another friend was going through a crisis at work. “I’ve tried everything I can think of. I guess I’ll pray.”

Why is prayer often the last thing we do and not the first? Why don’t we pray more? First, we don’t pray because we’re not sure that prayer really works. If we really believed God hears and answers our prayers, we would pray all the time. If we really understood prayer, it would be the principal habit of our hearts. It would be our first resort, not our last.

Second, prayer is hard work. One day I was in the car with Bill and Vonette Bright. At the time Vonette was the chair of National Day of Prayer-she even got Congress to make it a law! I nearly ran off the road when she said, “Prayer is hard work. Sometimes I find it hard to concentrate. My mind wanders.” Well, I already knew that was true for me! But I didn’t know it was true for one of the world’s great prayers! What an encouragement! Prayer is hard work. At times it’s hard to stay focused. Also, no one holds us accountable to pray.

Prayer is the currency of our personal relationship with Jesus. However, it does us no good if we leave it on account. We must make a withdrawal and spend some of it through prayer. Pray with a pencil-the benefits of seeing how God has worked will be well worth the efforts.

Prayer changes things. However, God doesn’t answer petitions that are not presented. If we go about solving our challenges in our own strength, we rob God of the glory He wants for Himself. He would rather us come humbly before the throne of His grace so that He can give us mercy and help in our times of need.

Prayer changes us. Prayer breaks strongholds. Prayer determines the destinies of men, their families, their communities, and their nations. Only an army of men on their knees can turn the destiny of America back to God. It’s time for us to get on our knees and fight like real men!

Reflection and Application

1. How important is Bible Study? Can you think of any other way to become a Biblical Christian other than by studying the Bible? I can honestly say that I have never known a man whose life has changed in any significant way apart from the regular study of God’s Word. Why not consider making a commitment to study God’s Word as an exercise of spiritual discipline?

For example, in our quiet time you could read a chapter a day from the New Testament as already mentioned. Or, you can purchase a one year plan to ready through the Bible at your Christian bookstore. Personally, each year I read through The One Year Bible in a different version- it only takes 10 to 20 minutes a day. If you want accelerated growth, read your Bible with a pen and pad nearby. Write down questions about passages you don’t understand. Then ask your pastor or a Bible teacher what God meant in those passages.

2. What is your prayer life like? Is prayer a significant part of your life? Do you sense a close, personal communion with Jesus when you pray? Or is your prayer life more limited, mechanical and unrewarding?

3. What kind of commitment do you currently have to a quiet time with Bible reading and prayer? What kind of commitment are you prepared to make? This may be one of the most important decisions you will ever make.

To read this article in its orignial writing please visit Patrick Morely’s blog: Man in the Mirror.

Please view the trailer to Patrick Morley’s new book: Man Alive

I picks up where I left off in my last video, discussing Patrick Morley’s book, “Pastoring Men.

In my last video I asked and answered the question, “Pastoring Men, is it worth it?”

In today’s video, I talks about the collateral damage that happens as a result of men being one of our largest neglected people groups.  Below is a bit of the statistical damage:

  • of men who married between 1970 and 1974, just 46.2 percent will still be married after thirty-years.
  • of the seventy-two million children in America under the age of eighteen, 33 percent will go to bed tonight in a home without a biological father.
  • children in female-headed families are five times more likely to live in poverty, repeat a grade, and have emotional problems compared to families where a father is present.”

If you’re interested in learning more about these issues, you can pick up your copy of the book by clicking on the highlighted text, below, or you can go to the side bar and download excerpts.
Statistics taken from excerpts of Pastoring Men, by Patrick Morely

And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.” ~ Heb. 11:6

Have you ever thought about “having faith in the midst of your depression?”  That’s what I’m sharing in this video.

While  meditating on this video I started thinking about God walking us through vs. removing us from a situation.

When going through trials be it depression or otherwise, our faith has to kick in and become real for us.  Because sometimes when we examine our circumstances through the natural eye, it is hard to understand why a good and loving God would choose to allow us,someone who He has made in His likeness, and proclaims His love for would allow us to go through horrific experiences.

Then I remember . . .

God is love.  And because God is love, all that He gives comes through His hands of love.

What does that mean?

Essentially it means that a good and loving God, finds good in letting us go low during certain seasons of our lives, if that is what will bring us closer to Him.

Remember the Garden?  I would say Jesus was pretty, scared and depressed—He was pretty low in posture and spirit, yet God didn’t “take Him out of the garden.”  Instead God gave Him what He needed to go through—strength.  For a moment, I want you to think about all of the good and the love that came from God’s hands because He allowed Jesus to suffer?  Ah.  Isn’t that amazing.  Now that’s love.

What about when Jesus told Simon, “Simon, Simon, behold, Satan has demanded permission to sift you like wheat: but I have prayed for you, that your faith may not fail; and you, when once you have turned again, strengthen your brothers.”

Satan wanted to crush Simon (and the other disciples like grains of wheat).

What were Jesus’ words to His disciple?  Jesus assured Peter that though his faith would falter, it wouldn’t be destroyed.

Our faith will falter in many ways and many times.  We will become depressed by various situations that arise in our lives.  We will rise and we will fall, and our only comfort will be in knowing that the comforter is with is guiding us, carrying us through— walking beside us as we travel down our perilous road.  He may never remove the source that we feel is our pain but we will never be alone.

Those times are our wilderness moments.  It was because God loved the children of Israel that He took them through the wilderness.  Remember God didn’t want His beloved people being afraid if they took the shorter route because they would have seen war?

If you are a child of God’s you can be sure that He is working in your life and He is working things out.  Sometimes the pain that we experience is for a good reason, though it doesn’t feel good.

Please grab hold of learning to embrace your life and its situational truths.  Learn to embrace your reality friend because in acceptance lies peace.  And once we have peace we can begin to have a clear mind, and a clear mind can start us to look at our situation differently and better, giving light to things that just seemed bleak and dim a day or so ago.

Once you’ve taken hold of the truth begin to move forward, even if you must move at a snails pace—keep moving.

Once again, here are the symptoms that I gave  in the video:

1.  aggressiveness

2.  irritability

3.  blaming others

4.  falling into a comfortable sin

5.  sadness {we don’t want to accept reality}

6.  emptiness

Thanks for stopping by and we’ll see you next time!

{image source}

Here at “Who Me Be a Leader“, we are not male chauvinist, but we do believe that God has a structure for everything and for a reason. Men are to lead their families no matter what happens and where they find themselves.

In this video, Ronnie talks to fathers who find themselves away from their home, whether its due to incarceration or divorce.God has entrusted you to the role of Father if you have children.  We also believe that in order for this to take place that you need God’s help and His grace. So, Men, we are challenging you to turn your heart towards home so God will be able to use your efforts to bless your children.

At “Who Me Be a Leader?”, one of Ronnie’s desires is to help men develop an understanding of their birthright.  We believe that if a man is unable to lead himself individually, then it is unlikely he will be an effective leader of his family.  Within this video Ronnie is helping men to see that wealth can sometimes cause a man not to seek God.

First Timothy 6:17 says to instruct those who are rich in this present world not to become conceited or to fix their hope on the uncertainty of riches, but on God.

We believe that a life unexamined is not a live worth living.

Remember when men were men? Remember when you could tell by looking? Remember when men knew who they were, liked how they were, and didn’t want to be anything but what they were?

Remember when it was the men who boxed and wrestled and bragged about how much they could bench press?

Remember when it was the woman who wore the makeup, the earrings and the bikinis?

Remember when it was the men who initiated the contact and took the lead in a relationship, made lifelong commitments, and modeled a masculinity grounded in security and stability?

I’m talking about men who are discerning, decisive, strong hearted, who know where they are going an are confident enough in themselves (and their God) to get them there. Men who aren’t afraid to take the lead, to stand tall, firm in their principles, even when the going gets rough.

Such qualities not only inspire the respect of women, they also engender healthy admiration among younger men and boys who hunger for heroes. We need clear-thinking, hard-working, straight-talking men who, while tender, thoughtful, and loving, don’t feel the need to ask permission for taking charge.

Over the last three decades, we have seen a major assault on masculinity. The results are well represented in the arts, the media, the world of fashion, and among those who have become the heroes of our young people.

“Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.” 1 Corinthians 16:13

Excerpted from Day to Day with Charles Swindoll.

Men giving back…reflecting their rehabilitation. When Jesus calls us to come follow Him, we leave our old life behind.  Our name changes, we go from “unbeliever” to “believer,” from “children of darkness,” to “children of light.”

Many men (and women) in the Bible were given new names by God:

  • Abram became Abraham
  • Simon the fisherman became Peter
  • Saul the persecutor became Paul

God has called YOU to a new identity, regardless of where you are—live.  Your new name is DAD— FATHER.  When your child was born you went from man to father.

I know the state and society has sentence you, BUT DON’T SENTENCE YOURSELF.  Today, start being a FATHER to your child.

“All they can GIVE is LOVE.”